Investigate/Discovery

Joseph Hanoa is the founder of www.marriageadvising.com/, a website that answers questions dealing with couples help.

Infidelity Discovered: "I Need My Space!"

Dr. Robert Huizenda, The Infidelity Coach, is the founder of www.break-free-from-the-affair.com and author of the book “How to Break Free from the Affair.” He is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, and holds a Doctorate of Ministry in Marriage.

When infidelity rears its ugly face, the cheating spouse often explains his/her dilemma with the words, "I Need my Space!"

My husband & I had planned a cruise for 2 years and were going 2 weeks ago. He came home told me he couldn’t go with me! I had no clue why. I begged and pleaded for him to reconsider. He told me he would think about it and give me an answer 2 days later. He came home quickly on Monday saying he had to tell me something. He told the woman he was having an affair with that he was going to try to make our marriage work and was going on the cruise with me and was ending it with her. She became angry and threatened to come to our home and beat me up and tell me what had been going on for over a year. He told me all of these 5 days before we were to go on the cruise with 22 of our friends. I was so broken and shocked. Then another bombshell 2 days after we got home from our trip: our oldest stepson had been living with my husband’s affair and he knew all about it for the last year. I was over the top with grief and still am trying so hard to function. My husband involved our son in this terrible thing and the son held this over his head. too. I just don’t know where to go or what to do with all of this. I have been trying so hard just to make an hour not crying and vomiting. He says he wants us to work this out but he refuses to talk to me or go for counseling. I feel like I am so alone and in shock. He says he takes full responsibility but I don’t feel it.

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