Therapy

Andrew Bicknell researches and writes about a variety of subjects, including those dealing with relationships and infidelity.

Open Your Heart To Love

Dr. Tim Ong is a medical doctor who has a keen interest in self improvement and personal transformation. In his free time, he teaches meditation and gives public talks. He is also the webmaster of MindScienceInfo.com.

Many people live without love. They cannot love themselves or anyone else. Some feel that they do not deserve love. But without love, no matter what else you have is not enough. We need to love ourselves unconditionally in order to live fully.

My husband and I have been married 15 years. He is now 40 and I am turning 39 soon. 2 years ago, I ended a 4-year affair with a man 7 years younger than me. He was a family friend who shared birthday parties, get togethers, camping and holidays together along with other friends. My husband worked out of town our 13 years out of our marriage and I was left working full time taking care of our three daughters. My intention of the affair was to never leave my husband and keep it casual since he was a womanizer. I wanted the challenge of making him fall in love with me and he did but I still would not leave my husband even though I was falling in love too. I convinced myself that it was lust and only that. He moved away for 1 1/2 years and has returned with a fiancé and bought a home. We keep in touch via emails and flirt but I can't seem to break into the bad habit because for 2years now everything has changed in my marriage. My husband is now in town all the time and we are newly grandparents. I would say my grandson is the glue in our family now. You’re probably thinking I don't know what it feels like to be on the other end but I do.... I caught my husband cheating with a one-night stand with a client at their hotel. After a phone call one evening, my husband sounded different so I bought a pack of cigarettes (occasional smoker) and drove 2 hrs. away to the hotel and waited for him to come to his room at 5am. Of course he denied it but I knew all the signs, he erased all calls on his cell phone and denied everything. I knew I wouldn't get the truth from him so I made every attempt to find out who this other person was and you will not believe how easy it was. I found out who she worked for, her addresses, cell number, etc. I spoke with her and she was surprised, she old me everything and sounded scared and regretful (only 27 yrs. old). I wanted to tell him, you think you're so cool because you had a young one...well I've been having a 4 years affair with a young one too and he's in love with me.... but I never told him and never will.

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