Self-Esteem: You Are Not Who You Think You Are
Margaret Paul, Ph.D. is the best-selling author and co-author of eight books, including "Do I Have To Give Up Me To Be Loved By You? and "Healing Your Aloneness." She is the co-creator of the powerful Inner Bonding healing process.
Becoming Strong Enough to Love
David sat in front of me at one of my five-day intensive workshops. A successful businessman with a wife and two grown children, David believed that he was not good enough.
"I'm insufficient," he said. "I'm inadequate."
I looked at this kind man and felt deep sadness for him. He did not know who he was.
"Why do you believe that?" I asked.
"I didn't do well in school, and I've made lots of mistakes in my life."
"So you are basing your worth on your performance, right?"
"Of course."
David could not conceive of any other way of defining his worth other than through his performance - which he never saw as good enough.
I asked David to look inside - at the essence of himself - and tell me what he sees. All he saw was emptiness.
"David, please close your eyes. Now imagine a wonderful being who loves you very much. Who comes to mind?"
"My grandfather. He died when I was young, but he really loved me."
"Good. Now imagine that you are seeing yourself through the eyes of your grandfather. What does your grandfather see when he looks at you?"
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