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CASE STUDY - "LUCY"

"My husband and I always had a decent sex life. After being together for s many years it was only natural that we experimented with different techniques, but L never got too kinky.

Last year my husband bought a home computer and became addicted to it and I didn't pay too much attention, because I felt that it was good for him to broaden his horizons. And when our son got older, his daddy could use the computer to help him with his homework.

But soon, I felt as though I was no longer married, as my husband was in love with his computer; spending endless hours on-line. Once I woke up in the middle of the night and found him at his computer watching very explicit porno. He claimed it was just for kicks. But I realized my husband had become obsessed about trying new sexual techniques—all he wanted was to tie me up to the bedposts.

He was way out of control, and was getting these crazy ideas from the computer. I decided that when my husband was at work, I'd learn to surf the net to see what else he was into. Luckily, my husband kept a notebook next to the screen with his password. I logged on, and got notified to check "my mail." That's when the nightmare began.

I found disgusting e-mails from a woman I never heard about, writing about their incredible sex, and she couldn't wait until their next meeting at the usual place where they'd try out new games. She was into S & M. I sat there stunned! How could this be? I couldn't believe how gullible I was — he was having a real affair with a real person with his computer.

After confronting him, I learned that he had met her in a chat room, and one thing led to the other — which lead me to my lawyer’s office!"

WHAT YOU NEED TO KNOW

New sexual techniques often become evident when you know your spouse always enjoyed having sex a certain way. For example, if your spouse has a new sexual technique, you might not believe this idea came from watching porn on the internet. A new sex partner is probably where they learned it.