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Aren’t titles like this intriguing? Do you find that you are asking yourself, “Magic Formula to what? If so, read on.

Og Mandino, author of “The Greatest Secret in the World” writes about Benjamin Franklin probably being the greatest and most influential individual this country has ever produced. He was a patriot, scientist, author, diplomat, inventor, printer and philosopher. He taught himself French, Spanish, Italian and Latin. Without his skillful guidance the U.S. might never have gained its independence. BUT…even Ben Franklin had bad habits and he realized it. However, unlike most of us, he determined to do something about his.

He worked out “A Magic Formula” to correct his bad habits. How did he do this? First of all, he listed what he believed were the thirteen virtues necessary for true success. They were: temperance, silence, order, resolution, frugality, industry, sincerity, justice, moderation, cleanliness, tranquility, chastity and humility. Ben Franklin said, “My intention being to acquire the habit of all these virtues, I judged it would be well not to distract my attention by attempting the whole at once, but to fix it on one of them at a time; and when I should be master of that, then to proceed to another; and so on, until I should have gone through the thirteen.” He examined his actions each day and recorded them in a book where he allotted a page for each of the virtues.

So what are the virtues necessary for the true success in your relationship? Why not sit down with your partner and ask this important question? Brainstorm and generate a list for each of you and then make it a goal to become a master of each virtue, one by one, just the way our founding father, Benjamin Franklin did. Let’s say after brainstorming, the most virtues you are able to come up with are eight, five, or only three—then what? Let it be whatever number you come up with! It takes both time and effort to work on this. You may find yourself asking, “What exactly is a virtue?” Virtue is defined as “moral excellence or goodness”. My own definition is that a virtue is a quality that produces the goals that you want to accomplish emotionally, spiritually and tangibly as a happy couple. Some words to start you off (but please do not let them be limiting) may be: honest, sincere, generous, gracious, humble, motivated, sensitive, go-getter, energetic, creative, expressive, organized, gentle, strong, soft-spoken, articulate.